Working in an adult hospice means there are many occasions when our work touches the lives of children and young people. This might be through children visiting a much-loved family member at the end of their life, or students undertaking work experience as part of their health and social care learning.
However, not everyone feels comfortable including children and young people in conversations about serious illness, death, dying, and bereavement. Adults often try to protect children by shielding them from sensitive discussions, but this can lead to confusion and misunderstanding when someone important in their life becomes seriously ill or dies.
The UK Commission on Bereavement (UKCB) was established in June 2021 to examine the key issues faced by bereaved children and adults across the United Kingdom. Their report, Bereavement is Everyone’s Business, provided recommendations on how best to support children and young people. These included ensuring that children feel supported both before and during a death, and that they have confidence that the person who died received appropriate and compassionate care.
At Tapping House, we are striving to honour those recommendations by enhancing the skills of our staff in supporting children during their significant adult’s end-of-life care. We want children to feel supported not only by our team, but by their families, friends, and the wider communities around them. That’s why our Compassionate Communities team is developing a strategy and long-term plan to include and involve children more in our work.
Another key recommendation from the UKCB report is that children and young people should be sensitively supported by their school, college, or workplace during their bereavement — and this is where much of our current work is focused.
At Tapping House, we recognise the vital role that educators in nurseries, schools, colleges, and other education settings play in children’s lives. They are often the trusted adults a child turns to when someone close to them is dying or has died. Bereavement can affect so many aspects of a child’s life, and it’s essential that they feel safe and secure as they navigate their grief.
To support this, we held two school consultation events during the summer term, asking local West Norfolk schools how we could help them support grieving children. They offered many valuable ideas and suggestions for the future, but their biggest request was for us to deliver training to school staff to help them understand how best to support their students.
So far this term, we’ve held three training workshops, which have proved both popular and effective, sparking some incredible discussions. Our vision is for all pupils to feel sensitively supported by education staff — adults who understand the impact of grief and loss and who can offer students healthy coping strategies.
Children’s Grief Awareness Week, taking place from 17th to 23rd November, offers a chance to spotlight the impact of death and dying on children, young people and young adults. This year’s theme, Sharing Stories, Strengthening Hope, aligns beautifully with our aims at Tapping House. We know many children feel isolated and lonely around the time of bereavement, and while a significant loss becomes part of a child’s identity, it does not define who they are.
We want to help communities feel more comfortable showing care and support. Grief is hard for children, but adults can play a huge role in offering compassion and kindness during these
difficult times. We strive to encourage opportunities and moments to celebrate the lives of those who are dying or have died and to guide families in preserving precious memories.
This marks the beginning of our Compassionate Communities journey to develop our services for children and young people — and we look forward to sharing more updates with you soon.